Control.. Who doesn’t want it but too much can be bad.

What is control? Isn’t it something we all have to have? Isn’t it something we all need to survive in this life? Of course, there are times we must take control of a situation but when we carry it too far by trying to control everything?? It becomes a negative thing and affects your life and your health even. What about a control freak? Hmmmmm, I know some of you winced in pain there because you know you are:

Control Freak-A PERSON WHO HAS AN OBSESSIVE NEED TO CONTROL OTHER PEOPLE OR SITUATIONS.

Is this you? Are you like David in the Bible and try to control something that wasn’t yours to begin with? In II Samuel David did just a thing and maybe you think what you do isn’t as bad but is it?? Let’s look at what David does..

11 Uriah said to David, “The ark and Israel and Judah are staying in tents, and my master Joab and my lord’s men are camped in the open fields. How could I go to my house to eat and drink and lie with my wife? As surely as you live, I will not do such a thing!”

13  At David’s invitation, he ate and drank with him, and David made him drunk. But in the evening Uriah went out to sleep on his mat among his master’s servants; he did not go home.

14 In the morning David wrote a letter to Joab and sent it with Uriah.

15 In it he wrote, “Put Uriah in the front line where the fighting is fiercest. Then withdraw from him so he will be struck down and die.”

2 Samuel 11:11,13-15

Little did Uriah know, David had seen Bathsheba on the roof and now David had to hide his sin with her. So, the only way he could do it was to get Uriah drunk, pass out and sleep w/o going home to his wife. David had to think of something so he planned-tried to control the outcome-to place Uriah on the front line and then have everyone withdraw causing Uriah to be killed. Wow. Is that not intense and full of control?? Maybe you don’t think you do something that is that bad but do you? Do you withhold something from someone to “harm them” or “teach them a lesson?” Do you not do something in order to teach them a lesson or because you’re upset? In return what kind of damage are you doing to your marriage, finances and/or friendships? What is it doing to your relationship with God? Control can break you in half, ruin your life and your walk with God. What causes this control??  Fear.. Fear is the driving force behind our control.. We’re afraid of loosing control, we’re afraid of not knowing what to do or say, we’re afraid of not having an answer or the right answer, we’re afraid of what people and others may think…Is it making sense yet?? Be honest.. It’s our fear of rejection, failure and the unknown which are the root causes of our fear which in turn, creates control within us.. “Now now, it’s just that I want it done a certain way“-right?? Of course, the fear of something not being done to your standards or the way you want it.. “You don’t understand, I don’t know if where I’d get the money to build a new building, or move to another state or change jobs...” That fear of the unknown, lack of trust and unsure of God’s direction in your life because if He directed you to do it, then there’s no question.. Is it hard-of course, is it always clear-sometimes it seems it isn’t.. Look at Isaiah 41:10:

“So do not fear, for I am with you;… for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” 

God is assuring us, He is with us-He is your God, He will strengthen you, help you, uphold you.. This is the God of the universe saying He’s on our side-how awesome is that! How can we do this-what can we do?? How can we take control or can we take control of what’s holding us back?

First thing is to surrender our control and trust in God. We have to let it go and allow God to control us so that we can control the things in our life the proper way.. We have to learn to trust God more in our life and trust us less.. Proverbs 3:5-6 says it like this:

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding…and he will direct your paths.”

We must trust in God: 1-when you need Him, 2-when you want too,  3-only when I can’t handle it and I’m down to my last option… NO NO NO!! God says to trust in Him with ALL your heart…He even goes as far as to say do not depend on your own understanding and then He tells us why….He will direct our paths.. The God of the universe, our Heavenly Father wants to direct our path, how cool is that!!

Second, we must surrender our life to Him; no reservations and no holding back.. Psalms 51:1-2 puts it a different way..

“Have mercy on me, O God, because of your unfailing love. Because of your great compassion, blot out the stain of my sins.  Wash me clean from my guilt. Purify me from my sin.”

We have to ask for His mercy to cover our sins, to be the “lawyer” for our case, to hide the blemishes we have and are yet to come. Christ didn’t die for nothing, He died for you and I. We have to surrender our life so that we can lay everything down before Him. See, without surrendering our life, we still have the tendency to hold on to what we want to hold onto, keep the trash hidden behind the door instead of out where it should be, control the parts of our life we want to control.. Let’s face it, if we truly wanted to “take out the trash” in our life, we’d do it. Why do we wait until we “have to” before we actually do it? Why do we wait until we loose control…before we try and take control?? Let me say that again: “Why do we wait until we loose control…before we try and take control?”  We have to give it up, loose control so we can have control but through Christ. 2 Peter 1:6 explains it:

“and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness;”

So it’s clear or should be. 1-we must relinquish our control. We have to give it up and allow God to take control.. 2-we must surrender our life to Him. We have to lay everything out, lay all the cards on the table-allow God to do the work.. We must let go so we can gain control through Him.

So what are your thoughts? What are you thinking about your life right now?? Are you all in-giving your life to God and allowing Him to control our life instead of us?? It’s up to you but I will say this: giving up control so you can have control will be one of the best decisions you’ll ever make.. Don’t believe me?? Try it and let me know how it goes!

Anger, it’s ok right?? Kinda..

Let’s face it, to say we know someone who’s never gotten angry, never lost their temper or gotten out of hand at something during some point of their life-would be rare.. I know I’ve lost my temper and became angry alot, especially if you have children and/or spouse.. Lol. maybe a mom-n-law? J/K. You get the point right? We’ve heard so many different stories about whether or not anger is good or anger is bad. If you remember, Christ overturned the tables in the temple as He was very upset and angry. There is a difference-Christ controlled His anger, not allowing the anger to control Him.. Let’s face it, do we control our anger or do our emotions get the best of us?? Most of the time, it’s the latter. Well, first, let’s find out a little about anger and what the Bible says..

“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.

Ephesians 4:26-27

Christ tells us, do NOT let the sun go down while you’re angry.. Why? Well, the second part explains it: to keep the devil from getting a foothold in your life and heart. The devil is looking for any and I do many ANY crack or crevice to get into your life and ruin it! What happens if he does sneak in and gets a foothold? Let’s take a look at how we control our anger in most cases: 1) Spewer or 2) Stewer.

A Spewer is someone who does just that-spews with no regard of the individual or those around them. They are not aware of the feelings of others nor are they concerned, at the time, with their actions. These people often times have to return to apologize for what they’ve said or never show up again because of what they said. (Sometimes it’s passed over as: “They just speak their mind, that’s the way they are.”) Spewers do a lot of damage to those around them and even hurt the people they love the most.

A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.
Proverbs 29:11

A quick-tempered man does foolish things.

Proverbs 14:17

Christ knew it would be a problem for us to keep our tempers under control as he said, a “fool give full vent to his anger.” When you allow anger to move into your life, you give it full reign of your life-unbridled.

On the other hand if you’re a Stewer, you suppress your anger. You walk around with the “fake” smile and tell everyone how it doesn’t “bother” you, but inside you’re boiling. Anger is so often related to a pressure cooker that we often over use it. A pressure cooker is created to hold heat until it reaches the boiling point; at which time it opens a valve releasing the heat until the pressure comes down and the valve closes. This process is repeated until the person cooking changes the situation or removes the heat from the cooker. With our anger, our emotion-our problem is we never move the cooker from the heat.. (We never remove what happens to us to make us angry, from our lives; we allow it to fester, to invade, infect our well-being and then we become bitter.

When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long.

Psalm 32:3

The older brother became angry and refused to go in…

Luke 15:28

So what do we do, what can we do? Christ tells us to put it out when we can, sometimes we have to let things go.

Starting a quarrel is like breaching a dam; so drop the matter before a dispute breaks out.

Proverbs 17:14

… Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.

James 1:19-20

God is very clear on how we should control our anger in James 1:19-20. Sometimes our anger and quick temper comes from our inattentiveness. If we’re truly honest with ourself, how many times do we have the problem answered and moved on before the other person or the problem just started. In other words, your spouse is upset at something you did or said-yet you think you’re right. So as you discuss the issue, you become defensive and basically you’ve shut down listening because you have everything solved…regardless of what is being said or going to say. Once you’ve become angry, your mind, body and overall demeanor shuts down and nothing is received. On the flip side, when we listen to what the other person is saying, accept it, think about it and return conversation, we stand a better chance of not speaking out of emotion or anger.

Controlling anger can be related to a map and destination. We all know if we get the right “map or GPS,” have the right know how and directions, we can take a trip. As long as we follow the map or GPS, we can arrive at our destination intact and safe. If we should deviate from the plan, it’ll try to re-route us or, we will end up going the wrong way and not in our prime destination. Anger is the same way. If we don’t listen to God and allow Him to control our anger, the end result can be tragic. If in turn we learn to listen to the “Godly” GPS we have built in, then our anger is controlled and we learn the proper way to handle situations appropriately.

So what are you so angry about? Why have you allowed this issue to come in your life and ruin it for your family and those around you? Maybe you’re upset due to a divorce, angry spouse or kids, what happened in the past or right now-maybe you’re just upset and angry and you can’t place your finger on it.. Let it go.. Please, let it go and allow God to control your anger and your temper. No one else can do it but Him and to think otherwise is foolish. What do you say? Are you ready to lay it down and allow Him to control it or do you still want to hang on to it and be a spewer or stewer? It’s your choice, you have to make the decision and live with it. Trust me, no matter WHAT you’ve been through, going through or think is worse, God can take care of it.

Helplessness..No where to turn..Dead end..

Ever heard these words before? More importantly, have you ever felt this way before; your helpless as you watch someone you love/trust go down a path of destruction..You’ve come to a dead end in your marriage, finances, life or you just feel like there’s no where to turn. There’s no one there to help you and the ones who are there, have their own issues and struggles therefore, you bottle the feelings inside. You know that’s not good, you need to open up and release it but the pressure keeps building and building. Of course you have everyone else telling you how and why you should do what you do; once it’s all compiled, you have no where to go..dead end.. You’ve been there huh?

It’s a terrible feeling especially when you feel all alone. Depression kicks in, thoughts run through your mind and to separate how God tells you to act and your emotions, it’s a huge struggle.  It’s been said that Faith is:

“Believing in what you can’t see because of the things you can see.”

That’s a tough pill to swallow but it also gives us hope. For example, you never think twice before sitting down in the same chair you put your “hope” in 1,2-3 years ago? You never think twice when starting your car because you turn the key and it starts…we place our hope in a lot of things on a daily basis but when it comes to God, we don’t truly trust Him. Why? I’m not sure why other than this sinful body but be honest..Do you truly trust Him to meet your needs when you’re down to the last $100 for the month and it’s the 1st week of Feb? Yet you’re tithing will take $20.00 of that money and so now the dilemma is, “Do I give the $20 or do I hold out for one more week until I get my check?” Do you trust Him when someone you love or even you gets sick, yet we will “pray for you” or we tell them, “just trust in God, He will see you through”. When it happens to us however, things aren’t as clear as it was when it was someone else.. Get the picture yet??

I know I don’t trust God the way I should. I have something I’m going through now and I know God will help, if I’ll move out of the way and allow Him to work; or listen to Him in my quiet time..DO my quiet time like I’m suppose too..

• Romans 15:13 NIV
  “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”

Romans tells us, God is a God of Hope, not hopelessness..A new beginning, not a dead end and a U turn, when there’s no where to turn. Allowing God to fill you with joy and peace AS you trust in Him, then YOU overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. You have to trust Him first, allow Him to fill your life/heart with the joy and peace that passeth all understanding. Through that filling of joy and peace, then YOU will overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. See, my problem stems by not allowing God full control of my joy and peace; my environment and surroundings are controlling them and that must stop. I’ve not allowed God to fill me up so therefore, I’m helpless, hopeless and I’m traveling down a road where there’s no where to turn except into a dead end.  I want what David say sin Psalms:

Psalm 71:14 NIV

“As for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more.”

Don’t you want to have hope? Do you want to feel like there’s no hope for the situation you’re in now and those to come or do you want to have victory? The outlook is up to you; now I didn’t say outcome because that’s where God wants you.. Your outlook is how you perceive and accept what God wants for your life. It’s not always what we want or what we even like at times, but God knows us better than we know ourselves. So, are you ready to stop feeling hopeless? Are you ready to have hope not in you, others or even your circumstances, but in God? What are you going to do to change it? What steps are you going to take to make things change so you’ll have Hope, a future and peace for the rest of your life? I know what I have to do, I have to start by praising God first for having this feeling and then allow Him to fill me with the hope He has for me. In return, I pass that hope onto those around me and I become better once again; not bitter. Something to think about because there will be changes you’ll have to make and accept, but in the long run, it’ll be worth it..

If you accept defeat, that’s what you’ll always get..

Ever heard those words before? It’s not easy looking circumstances and life in the face especially when it’s you that have all the cards stacked against you.  Matter of fact, when the car battery dies, ($100) Dryer goes out before a vacation, ($150) sister goes back in the hospital with a staff infection, (Priceless concern) you’ve just found out you have to move grade levels-AGAIN, (GRRRRRRRR) and you work from 7:00-5:30 every night for about 3 weeks….that’s very stressful, worrisome and nerve racking.. To say the least! That’s what happened to our family the week before we left for Kim’s business trip-all at once. Honestly, we needed the trip more than anything only to find out I’m moving grades and stress level of that move ignited. So needless to say, the stress died down for a week only to be picked back up upon arrival of home. ALL the while I’m accepting these things without grumble, gripe nor discontentment-totally for it right?!?! WRONG!! I secluded myself, fought for what I could and hoped people were behind me as I “drug” them along for the journey..Very unlike me and it didn’t do well for my character either. Through this time, I was getting further and further away from God but it was at a snail’s pace.. See, satan knew if he intervened and God “dropped” out of my life, I’d see it and go back. He knows your weakness!! Did I say that already? Yes, he knows and so he steadily withdrew me from the presence and I allowed him too.. (Or else I would have stopped it right?) I realized it when things were getting tougher and tougher, feelings of anxiety, overwhelmed and exhaustion filled my life; fatigue had finally taken its toll. I was defeated..

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As you can see, David didn’t believe in himself before he ever stepped up to kick. He was already defeated in his mind therefore his actions reflected his thinking. Our actions reflect our thinking when it comes to God and living accordingly. Romans 12:3 tells us by the Grace of God that’s given to every one of us, we should not think of our self more highly than others BUT rather think of yourself in clear thought, sound and mind according to the faith God has given you. (Paraphrase) Humbleness is a tough brick to break in our life and it’s not a popular one as well. When we think we’re better than someone else-rather by actions, words or thought, we not living according to God’s purpose and plan. What happens when we do, will the storms and trials of life still come? Sure and you better believe with a fury ONLY God can fight against.. As it stated in the movie “Facing the Giants” in an earlier scene, coach told his team they praise Him when they win, and they’ll praise Him when they loose..Either way, nothing but the best is given to God and we praise Him anyway..

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What’s in your life that is causing you to feel defeated, no hope, struggling and fighting the depressed feelings satan is flooding your life? Why don’t you turn your back on satan and turn your eyes on God, give Him the glory and honor and praise for what your going through. Start looking for the message IN the storm, NOT the mess the storms of life are bringing. As Christ-followers we are not victims-we are VICTORS! Stand strong, steadfast, surround yourself with those encouraging friends, life honor and praise to God for what he’s given you so far and what you’re going to receive. Find out what God is trying to show you through the storms in your life instead of concentrating on the storm.. Have you got me yet? Do you understand?? Lol.. Last thing: While the disciples and Jesus were out to sea, the bible tells us a violent storm rocked the boat, tossing and twisting the ship. Where was Jesus during this time.. Asleep.. Yes, Asleep!! He’s in the bottom of the boat asleep while the storm is violently tossing this ship.What did Jesus say to the ocean waves? “Peace Be Still.”  What do you need peace in your life for tonight?

Christ tells us in Psalms 108:13-”With God we will gain the victory, and He will trample down our enemies.” Deuteronomy 20:4a-“For the Lord your God is the one who goes with you to fight for you against the enemies.” I John 5:4-“For everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world.”  1-God loves you-period. 2-You are victorious in this life.

So it’s been forever-but I haven’t had the time…

Ok so it’s been like months since my last blog, I was going to start a series and then life hit.. I’ll be honest when I say- I didn’t want to blog, see or have any interaction with people. I was so dis-oriented, mixed up and confused yet I was happy with God and family. As time went on, things became-in my eyes at least, worse. Again I change grade levels yet this time, there’s a twist; 5th to 1st. I don’t know if you realize what that does but I’ll give you a hint; you go from being independent learners to TOTALLY dependent on YOU to learn. That means, vocab, spelling, math, words, direction etc. MUST be repeated on a daily basis, on an hourly basis-on a minute basis..(You get the point.) However, one thing I have learned about 1st graders-they love you anyway. They love you whether or not you judge them, get on to them, say or do something wrong and they love to give hugs.. What better gesture can brighten your day than a hug from one of these little guys.. I’m still struggling to survive and I’m not comfortable at all where I am but the song below has been on my mind since I found it. “Be still, there is a healer, His love is deeper than the sea, His mercy, it is unfailing and His arms are a fortress for the weak.” Lord knows I AM weak right now, struggling, hurting, confused and to say the least, ticked off yet humbled by having a job, family and being able to help alter the lives of those around me. I’m humbled by the help I’m receiving from the team I’m currently on, my Assistant Principal willing to stay after and help me to correct anything I need to correct.. Yet the battle rages on within one-self to be on top of things yet understanding all the while, there are sometimes you have to come down or up for a breath of fresh air. I’m going to attempt to blog again on a daily or at least on every other day to see if that will relieve some of my stress, anxiety and confusion. All I know is I’m so humbled and thankful for having a job, a family and everything I have; it all belongs to God.

I really want you to listen to this song and see where you are in your walk with God or in your Faith. Listen to these words and one thing I’ve got to work on more-is being quiet and listening to and for God. Many times I’m so busy doing what I’m doing, going where I need to go or making plans for my family/son but do I set that time away for God?? Sadly the answer is no, no I don’t. I often times give Him the leftovers of my day, the 9:59-th hour.. Right before time is up, I shoot my prayer up.  Here lately I’ve been struggling with the stress, anxiety and the demands of my career, family, life and spiritual health. I know I need to give it to God but when it comes down to it, I hang on to it for all it’s worth. I find myself back in the same place as before.. I need to stop, listen to God and for God to work and move in my life. It’s time I lift my hands and start believing again; it’s time I remember God is my refuge and IN HIM I find strength, strength like no other.. As I pour it all out on the table, I must remember God is Faithful in ALL our situations, faithful in everything we do for Him to receive the Honor, Glory and Praise!! I’m tired of being tired, I’m tired of being left alone, in the dark, confused-that’s NOT what God plans for my life and how can He use me if I’m in no place or shape to be used?? Psalms 32:8 tells us-”I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my loving eye on you.” (NIV).  I’m just tired, exhausted and worn out, I have very little to give or offer yet demands are greater and greater.. God told me He would place nothing on me I couldn’t handle but.. it has to be handled through Him and not me..

Enjoy the video and message it brings, I hope it blesses your life as it is doing mine at this time in my life..

 

Be still, there is a healer
His love is deeper than the sea
His mercy, it is unfailing
His arms are a fortress for the weak

Let faith arise
Let faith arise

I lift my hands to believe again
You are my refuge, You are my strength
As I pour out my heart, these things I remember
You are faithful, God, forever

Be still, there is a river
That flows from Calvary’s tree
A fountain for the thirsty
Your grace that washes over me

Identity 1-I Must Be Strong

A LIE BELIEVED AS TRUTH WILL AFFECT YOU AS IF IT WERE TRUE.

When (the devil) lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies. John 8:44

Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.  John 8:32

Have you heard the old saying, tell me so many times that I’m sick-I’ll get sick? Well, it’s true and for those of you that don’t believe it, believe it-it’s true. That’s the saying here, a lie believed as truth can and will affect you as if what you said were true.  Meaning, we believe something long enough and it’ll come true. So why doesn’t this work with our own self? I mean, we tell our heart/head that we can or can’t do something and it comes true, we tell our self we are “nothing” and we need others opinions to make it right. We tell ourselves to do something and when we put our mind to it, we accomplish our goal…Why do we struggle believing what God wants and desires for us? Why do we struggle believing we are good enough and we are God’s creation whom He loves so much and gave up His son for our sins?

One of the ways we are strong and need to be strong is emotionally. Emotionally, we are creatures of habit and behavior. We do things we desire and most of the time are driven by our emotions. Therefore, we are so strong emotionally we alter our own path in life so we must be strong emotionally. We must remember our power is limited yet God’s power is unlimited!

“Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” Isaiah 40:30-31

I think Isaiah says it all, that even the young are weary and grow tired, stumble and even fall.. However, those who have “hope” in the Lord will renew their strength. Wow, isn’t that refreshing, God will renew our strength if only we have hope in Him. However, it’s not easy and actually, the word tells us the strong will survive, survival of the fittest, best of the best.. God sees it a little different. In order for God to control your life, you have to loose it. Look at John 12:25-26. “Anyone who loves their life will lose it, while anyone who hates their life in this world will keep it for eternal life.” Other words, you have to loose your life here on earth, give it over to Him and He will give you eternal life. It’s so difficult to do such a thing not only because of human nature but that means we loose control, we hand it over and take it out of our hands.. For us, that’s a difficult concept to grasp and understand.
I HAVE TO BE WEAK.
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.  That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses…For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

Eudokeo—think well of, to delight, to embrace.

Charis –          unmerited favor, divine influence upon a heart.
Arkeo -           eliminating a barrier, sufficient, exactly enough.
Dunamis -       explosive, miraculous power.
Teleitai –         completely fulfilled.
Astheneia -     disease, infirmity, brokenness.

God’s divine influence is exactly enough to meet your every need.  For his explosive miraculous power is made completely perfect in you when you are broken before Him.

“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power.” Ephesians 6:10

In order to control and protect your identity, you MUST be strong. In our life, we’ve grown to fight for what we want, our priorities control our fight and if we don’t make the identity of ourself IN God, BY God and Through God, we will miss out on God’s plan for our life. We are GOD’S creation, He created you like you are and to give Him back anything but your best, is shorthanding the Father and our creator.

Genesis 1:27 tells us: “So God created mankind in His OWN image, in the image of God He created them; male and female He created them.”

Before and after verse 27 God continues to say, “what He saw was good, he was pleased and all He created was good.” Why? Because He created you in this life for specific purpose and without God in your life, you’ll never know what that purpose maybe.. You’ll begin filling the void with alcohol, drugs, pornography, things and materials of the world. You’ll try to fill it with anything you can and when that doesn’t work, you’ll continue down the destructive path you’ve laid out for yourself. Trying to fill the void which God can ONLY fill, will always result in disappointment, let down and confusion. God IS the answer to your problems, issues and confusion in your life, whether you understand it or not, He IS there for you.. (More so in your darkest hour.)

So, what step are you going to take in order to be strong? How are you going to be strong in your identity of who you are through and IN God? Or, will you continue to fight the urge, allow things and people to steal your identity and purpose in Christ of who you are? The choice is up to you and if you need help, I’ll be more than honored and pleased to do what I can. (Or I’ll find the answers if I don’t know it.)

(Thanks to LifechurchTv for the resources.)

Pursue..Who Chases Who??

The last post in the Vow Of Marriage was the vow of priority. To make God our #1 priority and our spouse #2. Did you know that by nature, we pursue what we don’t have?? So can you guess what the 2nd vow is? The Vow Of Pursuit.

We must make a promise to make God your first priority and your spouse as your 2nd priority.

Vow Of Pursuit:  I promise to Always Pursue My Two. See, Christ tells us that a man will leave his father and mother and be “united.” United-dabaq; cling or adhere; to catch you by pursuit, pursue hard with affection and devotion.

Christ tells us in Psalm 63:8 that “I will follow close behind you.”

“They are joined fast to one another; they cling together and cannot be parted.” Job 41:17

“They…pursued hard after them…” Judges 20:45 KJV.

See, united just doesn’t mean together, but to pursue, cling, adhere, pursue hard with affection and devotion. (My favorite part.) Do we treat our spouse that way? Do we pursue them daily? Weekly? Hourly? Monthly?

A pastor was preaching a sermon on “How to Improve Your Marriage” and he was on the series of love and sex. He boldly asked the congregation to raise their hand if their love life is 3-4 times a week.. Some people raised their hand, he asked for those 3-4 times a month and a majority of the congregation raised their hands. He finally got down to one night of the year and a guy was happily jumping up and down and the pastor asked him, why he was so happy.. The gentlemen responded, “Tonights the night!”

We tend to judge our spouse by his/her actions and ourselves by our own intentions.. True or not? Think about it and be honest with yourself. We must rid ourself of that kind of thinking.. We must think good things, and then SAY IT! We must pursue her with words of affection while pursuing him with words of affirmation. Did you get that? HER with AFFECTION and HIM with AFFIRMATION..

When you think of something good, say it and likewise when you think of something special, DO IT! Of course money is an issue at times but spending 10 extra minutes on the couch cuddling, lying next to each other playing and making each other laugh-those are free and priceless. More importantly, when we want something to be different...BE it.. We must allow God to transform us, not our spouse.. So many people try to change their spouse but more often than not, it’s us which need changing.. Marriage is a compromise, a work in progress and something you work for on a daily basis.

Finally, God gives us an example of Him pursuing us. In Luke 15:4, He speaks about someone having a hundred sheep and loosing one of them. Would you not go after the lost sheep or continue to look for it until you find it? Christ later confirms this when He says He’s the Shepherd and if one of His sheep, (us) wander astray, He will go look for it and return it to the flock. Christ is pursuing us but the question is, are WE pursuing God? Is it just on Sunday you “become” a Christian, or maybe when you’re speaking with a Pastor or other church official, or maybe it’s during the day but at night you’re someone different?

Hey, it’s not easy and we’re all hypocrites in one way or the other but Christ has forgiveness, mercy and grace in which He grants us a life which was created By Him FOR Him.. He’s not our magic genie in a lamp or the “go to” God when the chips are down, He Is God and He created us FOR Him..

So what’s your choice tonight? Will you make the difference it requires or takes, to pursue God first and foremost and your spouse second? Are you happy with your life the way it is and no priority is needed? It’s your call but I hope God is your choice for your marriage. It’s made the TOTAL difference in our marriage and without Him, we would have never made it..

Lead Me..

“So Father, give me the strength To be everything I’m called to be

Oh, Father, show me the way To lead them Won’t You lead me?

To lead them with strong hands To stand up when they can’t

Don’t want to leave them hungry for love, Chasing things that I could give up

I’ll show them I’m willing to fight And give them the best of my life So we can call this our home Lead me,

’cause I can’t do this alone Father, lead me, ’cause I can’t do this alone”

Sanctus Real sings this song called “Lead Me” and if you ever have time to listen or watch the video, I highly recommend. It’s kinda been on my mind here lately and the more I hear it, the more I want to hear it. It’s one of those songs which I think men should hear and pray about. (Re-read the lyrics real quick) Since we, the men are going to have to answer before God concerning our family and our lives. The way we live, act and become examples to our children and those around us account for so much more than what we truly realize.

Christ tells us in Proverbs 4:21:  “Give careful thought to the paths for your feet and be steadfast in all your ways. (27) Do not turn to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil.”

Meaning, we have to be careful where we walk not only with our physical feet but with our spiritual feet as well. Most of the time it’s a man’s instinct to want to “take care of the problem” or “fix it” however, we forget sometimes God is the mechanic of our lives. If we would just trust in Him, allow Him to lead our paths so we won’t “turn” to the right or the left; or when we do, we’ll quickly return on the straight path. Christ is very blunt to the men:

Christ tells us in Ephesians 5:23: “For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.” (25) Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, (26) to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, (27) and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.”

Men, we have a tough but do-able task ahead of us.. Look at the song again and read the verses, are they not similar in some fashion? Do you not see the correlation of someone praying to God to “lead them” when Christ tells us to give careful thought..not careful consideration, suggestion or other, but careful thought. How many times have we said, “I didn’t think about that or something to that affect?” Christ tells us to “think and be careful” in order to choose the right path for our lives so we will trust God and allow Him to lead us.

To lead me, with strong hands, to stand up, when they can’t

Don’t wanna leave them hungry for love chasing things, that I could give up,

Show them, I’m willing to fight and give them the best of my life

I know, we call this our home but I, still feel all alone….

Where are you? Do you feel alone, depressed, defeated and of little worth? God will give you rest, comfort and the peace you need to defeat those thoughts. Christ tells us to take captive EVERY thought so before that depression or defeat enters into your mind, capture it and give it to the Father..Remember, in Proverbs 14:12 Christ tells us, “There’s a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death.” Our ways are not always Gods and when we begin to learn to give it to Him, things have a way of working out. (Maybe not the way we want them too or how, but they will.) So, what do you think? Are you tired of struggling, fighting for comfort or maybe you have an uneasy-restless feeling you’d love to get rid of-God is your answer.. Trust me, if He can do it for me, there’s NOTHING you have done or going to do that could turn His back on you-He loves you so much, He (1) created us for His pleasure and (2) gave His son Jesus up as a living and saving sacrifice for our sins. If that’s not love, I’m not sure what is..

Video and song by Sanctus Real: Lead Me.

Story behind the song-highly recommend viewing..

People…aren’t they strange??

I was sitting at the Mcdonalds eating with Jayden and spending time with him when I noticed people around me. All I could think of is wanting to ask them a question; simple yet perplexing and unique all rolled in one. “What’s your story?”. See, everyone has a story in their life yet some don’t share it. This in turn leads to people feeling lost, alone and feeling like they’re the “only one.” Then again, who wants to blast their story all over the place right? Well, before I get into that, let me give you some of my observations.

So funny just watch people and their mannerisms. For example, one elderly gentleman smeared hand sanitized over his hands scrubbing vigorously only to pick up his grandsons’ toy off the floor. A lot of good that did huh? Aren’t we all guilty of not paying attention to the things we do? Even more so, aren’t we guilty of taking a safe risk only to turn around and jeopardize it? Funny how the human nature seems to work and no one can truly grasp the concept.

God is so gracious and merciful to us. Just like the hand sanitizer, we may put it on with good intentions however the minute we touch something with germs etc., it defeats the whole purpose. I’m so glad God isn’t the same way. God loves us without condition and even when we mess up, He wraps us and shelters us with His loving care.

This Thanksgiving holiday, I’m so thankful for God in our life and mine. I’m thankful for my parents, sister and my family in more ways than one. I’m thankful for my job, our cars, friends and for our life that we live. I look at others at times and I think how could they but God reminds me: How could you?? That ends the questioning on my end and brings humility to my life. I could and can be in the same predicament if the decisions I make are incorrect, wrong or I ignore God right? What about those people who say thry grew up in a church family, under God’s rule and had a good life, was it their decisions? Support or encouragement? All I know is I’m so so thankful to have a healthy home, family, a good job, friends and a wonderful wife and son. Let’s face it, the only thing separating us from any situation is our decisions. With God however, those decisions are still never easy but at least you have someone to walk through it with and who better-God. Some question still remains…. What is your story?? Your story to share with others in the same place, fighting out of a similar place or even who made it through…..you have it, why not share it??

Christmas.. What does it mean to you..

I would love to hear from you concerning what Christmas is to you.. There are a lot of misinterpretations out there about what Christmas is,  what is it’s meaning and how we should celebrate it. I would love for you to tell me what it is to you..

To me, Christmas is about celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ the King. A little boy born in a manger because there was no room in the inn. It’s about the birth of a child by a virgin who’s only reason for being born was to die for our sin.. How great yet how sad to be born just to die for people who don’t accept him, get to know or even admit he is real.  If He didn’t die however, our sins wouldn’t have been forgiven and we wouldn’t be where we are today..

Christmas to me is also about Family. Sharing the joys, laughter and the Christmas spirit I use to have as a child carrying that over to my family and son. The days of baking candy 1-2 days before Christmas, sharing stories of the Christmas holidays past, being together and just loving on family. I love Christmas and all it has to offer-the spirit and the meaning.

So, comment on the post to let me and others know what Christmas is too you.. And OH.. If you don’t celebrate this holiday, I would love for you to tell me what you do celebrate and what it means to you. Thanks so much and from my family to yours:

MERRY CHRISTMAS, HAPPY HOLIDAYS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!