Let’s face it, to say we know someone who’s never gotten angry, never lost their temper or gotten out of hand at something during some point of their life-would be rare.. I know I’ve lost my temper and became angry alot, especially if you have children and/or spouse.. Lol. maybe a mom-n-law? J/K. You get the point right? We’ve heard so many different stories about whether or not anger is good or anger is bad. If you remember, Christ overturned the tables in the temple as He was very upset and angry. There is a difference-Christ controlled His anger, not allowing the anger to control Him.. Let’s face it, do we control our anger or do our emotions get the best of us?? Most of the time, it’s the latter. Well, first, let’s find out a little about anger and what the Bible says..
“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.
Ephesians 4:26-27
Christ tells us, do NOT let the sun go down while you’re angry.. Why? Well, the second part explains it: to keep the devil from getting a foothold in your life and heart. The devil is looking for any and I do many ANY crack or crevice to get into your life and ruin it! What happens if he does sneak in and gets a foothold? Let’s take a look at how we control our anger in most cases: 1) Spewer or 2) Stewer.
A Spewer is someone who does just that-spews with no regard of the individual or those around them. They are not aware of the feelings of others nor are they concerned, at the time, with their actions. These people often times have to return to apologize for what they’ve said or never show up again because of what they said. (Sometimes it’s passed over as: “They just speak their mind, that’s the way they are.”) Spewers do a lot of damage to those around them and even hurt the people they love the most.
A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.
Proverbs 29:11
A quick-tempered man does foolish things.
Proverbs 14:17
Christ knew it would be a problem for us to keep our tempers under control as he said, a “fool give full vent to his anger.” When you allow anger to move into your life, you give it full reign of your life-unbridled.
On the other hand if you’re a Stewer, you suppress your anger. You walk around with the “fake” smile and tell everyone how it doesn’t “bother” you, but inside you’re boiling. Anger is so often related to a pressure cooker that we often over use it. A pressure cooker is created to hold heat until it reaches the boiling point; at which time it opens a valve releasing the heat until the pressure comes down and the valve closes. This process is repeated until the person cooking changes the situation or removes the heat from the cooker. With our anger, our emotion-our problem is we never move the cooker from the heat.. (We never remove what happens to us to make us angry, from our lives; we allow it to fester, to invade, infect our well-being and then we become bitter.
When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long.
Psalm 32:3
The older brother became angry and refused to go in…
Luke 15:28
So what do we do, what can we do? Christ tells us to put it out when we can, sometimes we have to let things go.
Starting a quarrel is like breaching a dam; so drop the matter before a dispute breaks out.
Proverbs 17:14
… Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.
James 1:19-20
God is very clear on how we should control our anger in James 1:19-20. Sometimes our anger and quick temper comes from our inattentiveness. If we’re truly honest with ourself, how many times do we have the problem answered and moved on before the other person or the problem just started. In other words, your spouse is upset at something you did or said-yet you think you’re right. So as you discuss the issue, you become defensive and basically you’ve shut down listening because you have everything solved…regardless of what is being said or going to say. Once you’ve become angry, your mind, body and overall demeanor shuts down and nothing is received. On the flip side, when we listen to what the other person is saying, accept it, think about it and return conversation, we stand a better chance of not speaking out of emotion or anger.
Controlling anger can be related to a map and destination. We all know if we get the right “map or GPS,” have the right know how and directions, we can take a trip. As long as we follow the map or GPS, we can arrive at our destination intact and safe. If we should deviate from the plan, it’ll try to re-route us or, we will end up going the wrong way and not in our prime destination. Anger is the same way. If we don’t listen to God and allow Him to control our anger, the end result can be tragic. If in turn we learn to listen to the “Godly” GPS we have built in, then our anger is controlled and we learn the proper way to handle situations appropriately.
So what are you so angry about? Why have you allowed this issue to come in your life and ruin it for your family and those around you? Maybe you’re upset due to a divorce, angry spouse or kids, what happened in the past or right now-maybe you’re just upset and angry and you can’t place your finger on it.. Let it go.. Please, let it go and allow God to control your anger and your temper. No one else can do it but Him and to think otherwise is foolish. What do you say? Are you ready to lay it down and allow Him to control it or do you still want to hang on to it and be a spewer or stewer? It’s your choice, you have to make the decision and live with it. Trust me, no matter WHAT you’ve been through, going through or think is worse, God can take care of it.
